If I've said it once

As a mother to young children I find that I can get by on just the most rudimentary of math skills, and a really just a few simple phrases that need repeating a few hundred times each day.

10. Blow your nose instead of sucking those boogers back in.

9. Don't hit: your brother, your sister, the door, the wall, the window, me, my eye, your dad..

8. We don't eat food off the floor.

7. Walls are not for writing. (Interchangeable with finger-painting or stickers.)

6. Do not bring home a gift, treat, toy, candy for only one of our children.

5. Sleep is not the enemy.

4. I can't understand you when you: mumble, talk with your mouth full, scream like a banshee, cry like a baby, or yell at me from the other room.

3. Yes you have to: wear underwear, brush your teeth, comb your hair, and wash your hands no matter how many times you've done it before.

2. I'm sorry I'm late. My kid: threw up, had a diaper situation, played hide and seek with my keys, refused to get dressed, won an award for the most dramatic breakdown ever..

1. no. No. NO. NONONONO NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!

It's the little things like -

No you can't jump off the back of the couch into a bucket of bubbles you made out of the laundry soap that was on a shelf higher than I can reach when I had my back turned for 42 seconds chasing down your brother who wrote on the wall, played with scissors, ate out of the trash can, and hid my cell phone so I can't call for backup.

that I didn't expect to have to say so often. Sigh. No telling what they've accomplished in the four minutes it took me to jot this down. ;)

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